This is a text I got from Lewis yesterday:
Just had a nightmare that after having paid off DISCOVER, Sybil told me I owed them $9,360. I demanded to see the statement. I was at 25 Taylor and our father was in the kitchen, shirtless, eating dinner. I demanded to see the statement and said: "Give it to me, you fucking cunt." Our father said he was calling the police. I put him in a headlock and made him look at Barry and Sybil while I said: "Look at them! They think you're a bum! I can talk convincingly. I'll have the police take YOU away."
As funny as Lewis's nightmare was nothing can top my dream last night:
Lews, Sybil and I were at a restaurant owned by David Hasselhoff. He was going table to table greeting the customers. When he got to our table, I couldn't get over how much he looked like Sybil, right down to the rouge on his cheeks. He looked at Sybil and the dish she was eating and asked if she liked it. She complained it was too spicy. David responded by saying that both his wife and girlfriend liked it. His wife then came to the table, all jealous, sat next to Sybil and started pushing her around. I then kicked this huge bowl of caesar salad off the table. It flipped and landed on David Hasselhoff's head, causing him to flip backwards on the ground. I looked at Lewis and said now that is a fucking blog post!
I woke up and typed notes so I wouldn't forget this glorious dream.
You either die a hero or live long enough to enough to see yourself become a villain
