For some reason my head hurts

So being that Sybil is 76 year old and about to have major surgery I figured it would be a good time to ask about her having things in order. Now I could go into how she of course thinks I want her dead to spend her money on action figures, but that is too easy. When asked, she basically accused me of killing my father because after two strokes, a heart attack and being unresponsive for a month I took him off life support.  Actually her exact words were I did that "real fast." She also mentioned that she knows I don't like her and I will do the same to her. When pressed about her will she produced a shopping bag filled with Bed, Bath & Beyond coupons and her last will and testament. Not being able to hold my temper in check, I started screaming how the fuck would I have found that if I didn't ask. Well, it was in the other room.  Of course, clearly I need to open my eyes. After going back and forth a bit, she told me each grand child gets $50k. Louise get's some money and the first thing I'm to do upon her death is identify her body and use her money to buy a mausoleum as she doesn't want to be in the ground. I'm picturing burning her like Darth Vader.

At that point in the conversation I ran away to my bedroom where she followed me and argued about not wanting to eat at the Kosher Nosh for dinner.

Actual bag that holds her Will.